I have never written an article in my life and the Editor knows; I never say no to a challenge. My Name is Itumeleng, I’m a wife, mother and mostly a self-driven person, I really don’t know how to attack this stigma but, the only way I feel it’s best to see the positive in it.
It all started when I was in high school, I was the black sheep of my family, and I was as rebellious as they come. At that time, I just wanted to snap out of it because I was told that I was out of control. Feeling like no one understood me, and truth be told no one did, even myself to a point that I would hear voices in my head, or feel like I’m seeing things such as small children telling me to kill myself as no one is giving me any attention or to what I have to say.
As the years went by, I carried on being out of control because already no one wanted to listen, until a time came where the headaches where unbearable and I needed help as they would not stop. I finally went to see a doctor who referred me to a Psychiatrist. Don’t be alarmed but still I did not take it seriously, and it consequently got out of hand that I realized that I would panic for no reason, lose breath and cry as I would deny I needed help because of the stigma attached to people who had a similar condition to mine which is known as a monster by the name of Bipolar Mood Disorder.
What is this you may ask? It is a chemical imbalance in the brain that causes mania or hypomania that is bipolar 1, which is the one I was diagnosed with. It does not mean you cannot be depressed but you can, and unlike Bipolar 2 those that are diagnosed with it get more of the cold dark days and are more at risk of suffering from suicide contemplation than anyone else.
But that is not all bad you can do something about it
I have been on antipsychotics for as long as I can remember and it does not end on medication as emotional support is more important because we need a ‘You can do this’ every now and then, followed by the most essential prayer for strength because most times people with this condition need to live as any other person would.
In-spite of it all I managed to qualify as an Aircraft Engineer, fixing large Boeings across the globe. I left the profession due to nasty vehicle accident. Currently I and my husband successfully run a growing company whilst rearing three active children.
the stigma that come with mental disability is that you are crazy, that you are bewitched, or you did something in your past that upset a lot of people and that they in turn unleashed their wrath upon you, and then there is what I call the worst theory that you did not obey your ancestral calling, which you never had in the first place and seemingly turned their backs on you. A far-fetched fallacy, it’s not even funny.
Everyone gets agitated every now and then, but the difference is, I don’t judge you or call you names at the end of the day. Don’t be too quick to judge. How about this? In spite of it all my marriage is fruitful, we are able to raise three children with my supportive husband and empower other people businesswise.
What tends to puzzle me is that the very same people that have said all the negatives about Bipolar 1 or 2 have the least information and have done no research about it at all.
The signs of it come in your teenage years and are never related to stress, yes stress is one of the elements, depression, mania or hypomania, headache, panic attacks are only some of the elements and it takes time to diagnose, so before you call someone else names get the facts straight. Stop with the name calling, stop with the stigma, I have tried to put this as positive and as intellectual as I know how.
I’m not bewitched and I’m not crazy. The only calling I have is to give praise to God, worship Him in truth and in spirit. The next time you think of labeling a person’s mother or another person’s partner, think of the damage you do more than the mental chemical imbalance itself.
Your words are the biggest weapon in any condition, so speak life not death and I love to laugh but my condition is not a joke, it is real. During the Lockdown on the corona virus, to me one of the reasons why it spread was because of the stigma. We are even scared to sneeze because of a stigma that came without facts, so let us be cautious.
At the end whatever condition that we find ourselves in, let us support each another. I don’t want pity from anyone but as much as I give respect as a patient, I also desire that as person, instead of putting on a label, let us give more knowledge to the world at large and work on removing the stigma out there.
It has also been proven on various occasions that people with the disorder have an above average intelligence so instead of the assuming craziness how about looking at genius!
Itumeleng Mkhaliphi
Soweto Sunrise News
